It’s crunch time in the 2016 presidential election and the polls are tightening as it becomes clearer and clearer that Hillary Clinton is the most corrupt person to ever don pantsuits. Trump rallies are bringing in thousands at a time and while everyday Americans show very little support for the candidate, filthy rich celebrities have come out in full force to defend her and draw crowds. Most rely simply on their name recognition to make the argument for them (appeal to celebrity) and the ones who don’t look absurd and even more fallacious. Here are the worst examples:
1. Louis CK: This hilarious comic decided to support Hillary, not to dissuade Trump because he has nothing against people who ideologically align themselves with Trump, but rather because he wants to see a mother in the white house (presumably because Hillary Clinton is the quintessential motherly figure—warm, nurturing, and caring? Then admits that she is not the quintessential mother but that she “takes care of sh*t.” “We need a two-faced, conniving, crazy, just somebody who’s just got a million schemes … We need just a tough, bitch mother who nobody likes, who just does the shit.” This is what an endorsement looks like from someone in a mental institution:
2. Pharrell Williams made the fallacious claim that it’s simply time for a woman to be president (regardless of her qualifications). At one campaign stop, he begged women to vote for her and tried to downplay the fact the fact that she’s the most brazenly dishonest politician in the history of the country by implying that all women are, “Has she been dishonest about things? Sure. Have you?”
3. After nearly a decade of counting on someone who basic youth find cool to promote, wealthy celebrities are stuck trying to defend someone who is decidedly not cool. So, James Franco decides to sell sex and a bunch of non-sequiturs (a la the most interesting man in the world) to sell Hillary.
4. Lena Dunham‘s Sensual Pantsuit Anthem will make you throw up more than a little in your mouth. How desperate can people be?
5. If all that doesn’t get you amped, how about a geriatric woman pimping herself out?
None of these have any substance and all rely on logical fallacies or simply their big name to make their point. As Jim Gaffigan tweeted, if you need a celebrity to tell you to vote, you probably shouldn’t be voting. Either these people are desperately incompetent marketers or they think American voters are the dumbest people on Earth. If Hillary is elected Tuesday, it may prove both.